I am still under home confinement, more like prison confinement. I feel bored with this kind of life; with all the ups and downs of my mood...
Saturday, I tried to see my psychiatrist to ask if I can already revert to my old life, to my normal life. But sad to say she is under hospital confinement also, in Mother Seton Hospital in Naga City. Ironic, isn't it? Life (or God?!) has played a lot of cruel games on me already. First was that I was supposed to graduate this March 2009, but look at this shit that is happening to me-- I am not allowed to go to school also. Damn it! Isn't that so nice of my dr.? or was it me that I was suppose to blame?
I feel like my luck has all ran out... But still thankful to have a very supportive family especially my Mama... yes... especially after my papa passed away last Feb 2, 2009. It was so funny how my sister-in-law became so worried about my initial reaction of my father's death. she thought I would freak out and cry a lot, but I DID NOT. I calmly accepted the whole thing as God's will. I am certain that my beloved papa is happier wherever he is right now that is why I did not cry so much. I grieved yes but I did not wail or cry my heart out the way my Mama did or my other siblings did... I cried some and then went on with my rotten life.
I hope I can soon get out of my cage. I wanted my freedom so badly as if I'm losing my life in the process of hampering my freedom to go wherever I wanted. No one wants to stay at home all day, all week and get bored, right?
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