Why I Love to Hate You

I wanted to know why i love to hate you
after all the years my bitterness never fades
because i can NOT be happy for you
now that you have somebody
you are just like your friend
who loves to hurt me and make me feel
like i am nothing but dirt on his shoe
after protecting and shielding him
all i get is NOTHING,
not even a word of thanks
i understand it was your master plan
i completely knew it was my duty to keep our "secret"
but NEVER AT MY EXPENSE! or most likely at
Tatay's expense.
you are really a son of a bitch for that...
you knew what will happen all along
YES, you are the great MANIPULATOR of them all
it's not that i cannot face you now
after all the insults you hurled at me
i paved way for you to brag about your self to our classmates
about your bitchy wife and bastard
and your damn work
you are good at that. PRIDE.
but you can never have too much of the good things,
that i know for sure
for someday you will pay for all the pain you have caused me
i will not be the one to do that (don't worry)
just go ahead. WAIT...

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for my "past" R.R.